Saturday, June 30, 2007

More propitiation required

Barking mad, fraudulent, sexually deviant shamans have emerged from their burrows, blinking in the bright sunlight, to explicate the latest rumblings of their petulant storm god.

The Bishop of Bling

The Bishop of Carlisle said that English pro-gay legislation has so angered the Hebrew deity that Yahweh has sent along more floods to uproot thousands from their homes.

And I thought it was just American nutbags who said things like this...

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

The Daily Show vs. "real news"

Rick Rojas posted an op-ed piece on how Jon Stewart's "The Daily Show" is providing better journalism than traditional outlets. I've seen comments like this before, and the usual context is how sad it is that traditional media sucks so much that a mere comedy show is a more worthwhile news source.

But it's not just that "The Daily Show" is great by comparison; it's great, period, and the difference is Jon Stewart himself.

What sets "The Daily Show" apart is Stewart's commitment to doing his homework. He's not just being snarky; he's up on the subjects, he reads his guests' books, and he has an equal-opportunity bullshit detector.

Investigative journalism has been on a downward spiral ever since the Reagan administration, when what passed for reporting was not much more than the verbatim regurgitation of Michael Deaver's press releases.

Even were it not so, "The Daily Show" would be valuable not only because it makes important news funny, but because it gets to the point quickly, exposes the hypocrisy, then moves on to the next issue.

Yay, Jon.

The four branches of government

The four branches of the US government are: Executive, Legislative, Judicial, and Cheney. At least, this is what I gather according to the latest pronouncements from the office of the Penguin-in-Chief.

As reported here and elsewhere, a 2003 Executive Order requires all Executive Branch agencies and "any other entity within the executive branch that comes into the possession of classified information" to report on said information.

Cheney said he doesn't have to comply since, as President of the Senate, the Vice President is not part of the Executive Branch.

A quick look at the US government's own informational web site reveals that
"[t]he executive branch of the government is responsible for enforcing the laws of the land. The president, vice president, department heads (cabinet members), and heads of independent agencies carry out this mission."
Dick "futue te ipsum" Cheney is a lawlessness unto himself.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

The more things change...

Here's the scene: people are being attacked and enslaved by Muslims. Why?
  1. The Koran says that anyone who does not acknowledge their authority are sinners.
  2. It's their right and duty to make war upon whoever they can find.
  3. It's their right and duty to enslave whoever they can imprison.
  4. Every Muslim killed in battle will go to Paradise.
No, this didn't happen recently; it was 1785, and Presidents Adams and Jefferson were dealing with the piracy of the Barbary States.

Read more of Christopher Hitchens' article here.

Infallibility, fallibility, re-infallibility

Some time ago, Joe Kennedy II got a divorce from his wife, and obtained an annulment from the Catholic Church; he subsequently remarried.

Then, his ex-wife decided she didn't like being nullified, so she sought and received a reversal of that decision. In effect, the annulment was annulled.

"First, there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is."

I can't think of any comment to make that's more ridiculous than the facts of the case, so I'll just wonder why someone wants their life to be ruled/ruined by a gang of thugs and child molesters in drag.

Hell's kitchen

I don't really care, but The Independent is reporting about celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay and the lawsuits he's been involved in.

I've seen bits and pieces of his "reality" show wherein he abuses his staff. I guess we're supposed to think he's an uncompromising genius or something, but what he really looks like is a major-league asshole.

It's only cooking, for fuck's sake.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Black enough

NAACP publisher Roger Wilkins introduced Barack Obama thus: "I want to tell you a secret from me to you: this man is black enough, I guarantee you!"

That's what Dr. King said, wasn't it? Umm:

"I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

Oh, that's right; King's speech was inspiring and appealed to what Lincoln called "the better angels of our nature."

Wilkins' comment was sadly revealing bullshit.

I've said it before in a different way, so I'll say it this way:

Bigots who won't vote for Obama primarily because he's black are no more ignorant and wrong than black people who support Obama primarily because he's black.

If Obama does win the Presidency, I won't be too surprised when I hear ill-informed cries of "Unka Tom! Unka Tom!" from those a shade darker than himself.

Monday, June 18, 2007

More Muslim malarkey

In a story reported by The Times Online, a violence-promoting Muslim group (is that redundant?) are offering a bounty for Salman Rushdie's murder, their spokesman adding, "we will bestow kisses on the hands of whomsoever is able to execute this apostate."

Non-US flags burn, too
The article, written by Ben Hoyle, went on to say, "Pakistan's national assembly earlier unanimously passed a resolution condemning Rushdie's knighthood, which it said would encourage 'contempt' for the Prophet Muhammad."

I hate to break it to Pakistan, but the thing that encourages my contempt for the Prophet Muhammad and his followers is the shameless hate-mongering of the religion of Islam (or "NAMBLA").

Are these just a few bad apples? Not all Muslims are terrorists, or dance in the streets when thousands of American lives are destroyed?

Prove it. Get your shit together. Prosecute your criminals. And get over yourselves: you're offended at everything; how infantile. Grow the fuck up.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Sir Salman

Reuters are reporting that Salman Rushdie is on the Queen's birthday honors list. Iran said that a knighthood for Rushdie is an insult to Islam, since Rushdie is one of the most hated figures in the Islamic world (which is quite an achievement in itself, as the Islamic world hates everyone, including itself).

This is just another example of how a religion turns its subjects into anti-intellectual, humorless, self-loathing, sycophantic slaves.

Islam--or "peace through submission"--brings misery, both to its followers and to its enemies. But at least Muslims have only their one god and their one thin-skinned prophet to obey. No, wait, they also have every priest or "scholar" who ever expressed an opinion about how and whom to hate.

Jews have one god, plus kings, priests, and prophets to interpret, while Christians see that and raise you a couple more prophets, followers, and hallucinating misogynistic letter-writers, to say nothing of the Moronic angels and space cadets of the 19th and 20th centuries.

Anyway, Mohammad Ali Hosseini (are all Islamic names some combination of the name of the deity, the prophet, and the prophet's spawn?), spokesman for the Iranian foreign ministry, said, "Honoring and commending an apostate and hated figure will definitely put the British officials (in a position) of confrontation with Islamic societies."

Oh, is that what does it?

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Another good week

  1. Useless skank Paris Hilton was ordered back to jail by the judge who sent her there in the first place. It seems that the Sheriff let her out on his own initiative (damned activist Executive Branch), and the judge was not happy. Neither was good-god-is-she-26-years-old Hilton, who shrieked and cried for her mommy. Maybe when she gets out, Hilton, Tara Reid, Lindsay Lohan, and Britney Spears can share a place.
  2. Isaiah Washington was fired from his job on Grey's Anatomy. Good riddance.
  3. Wesley Snipes claimed that the IRS are charging him with failing to file his tax returns for six years, not because he didn't pay his taxes, but because he's black. I've heard of being nabbed for "driving while black", but never for "failing to pay one's taxes for six years while black". Good luck with that defense, Wes.